Lightning Wine

Lightning wine, also known as storm wine, is an alcoholic beverage produced by submerging a bolt of lightning in fermented rainwater, and allowing the natural juices and currents of the lightning bolt to seep into the concoction. It is a heady, charged beverage that crackles going down and is thought to bring increased energy and vitality to whoever drinks it. The wine itself is relatively easy to produce, but the danger involved in lightning-hunting means that it is usually reserved for festivals and holy days, and is considered somewhat of a rarity.

To brew lightning wine, one must first catch lightning in a bottle. Catching lightning requires incredible reflexes, and a willingness to stand out in the rain for potentially hours. It is as much skill as it is random chance, but nonetheless, safeguards should be taken to prevent harm from coming to the adventurous sommelier. It is wise to acquire a pair of rubber-lined shoes and gloves, so that you may handle the lightning without experiencing electrical burns, and to avoid making a circuit with the ground in case of accidentally being struck. Once you have caught the lightning, it will begin to struggle violently, so immediately transfer it to a bottle made of glass, porcelain, or another non-conductive material, and cork it with a rubber stopper to prevent its escape.

While out lightning-hunting, presumably you should have some sort of apparatus set up to collect rainwater, which can be as simple as a bottle and funnel. This rainwater should be bottled tightly, and left in a dark, warm place for several days, so that it may ferment. While being very careful not to let the lightning escape, pour the rain alcohol into the bottle where the lightning is being kept, and continue until the bolt is completely submerged.

Let the mixture steep for anywhere from a few weeks to several years. While a minimum of at least three weeks is needed for the venom of the lightning bolt to be denatured by the liquor, and rendered safe for consumption, allowing more time will allow more of the lightning's essence to diffuse throughout the beverage.

Of course, eventually the time will come for you to open the bottle. This is sometimes considered to be the most dangerous part of the consumption of lightning wine. While steeping, the bottle will have acquired a significant static charge, which will discharge as soon as it is touched. Depending on how long it has been left to age, this can be anywhere from a small spark to a massive shock. However, this is a necessary step to activate the wine, and give it the distinct electricity it is known for. But remember to drink carefully. No matter how long it has been, there is always a small chance the lightning is still alive.